“Listen, there is no way any true man is going to let children live around him in his home and not discipline and teach, fight and mold them until they know all he knows. His goal is to make them better than he is. Being their friend is a distant second to this and serves no purpose.” – Victor Devlin
If you haven’t noticed, there is a crisis in America regarding young men and their ambitions. It has been written about hundreds of times as of late, probably thousands. The individuals in the media who write these pieces and produce them on television and other online outlets are always good at pointing out their foibles. Like clockwork, and with great regularity, these media types have also become excellent purveyors of the needs of the aforementioned young males.
But why do the solutions to their dilemma always seem to be absent? Why do they offer no solution other than some boiler plate self-help drivel? What is missing from these young men and what is absent in their lives? There is but one simple answer. Fathers.
Not all young men are without their main male role model in life. But many of them are without dads. Without a father present, they are often led by men who have been weakened by an oppressive system. A system which has continually told young males they are inferior, incapable and just plain wrong in the way they are living their lives and raising their families.
This article is not meant to disparage women and how they raise their sons. Many have done this without the aid of a father, but how many women would have done better with their sons had they had a male role model around? This is what we will examine in this commentary. The importance of a father’s role in his son’s life.
Because one thing is abundantly evident in our culture. Boys have become a nuisance in society. They are being tamed into submission. The current movement of social propaganda is the sexes are identical in all aspects. They are not. The differences are great. It is time we stopped kidding ourselves by pretending little boys and little girls are the same in regards to their social makeup. This is a pervasive lie being told to young males and females throughout culture and it MUST STOP. It is everywhere.
So how does a young father deal with the onslaught of anti-male propaganda infecting our society while trying to raise his sons? It starts with a few areas of a young boy’s life. I’ll examine each of them and try to help young dads with their impressionable young male offspring.
When I was a young lad, I was fortunate enough to have a strong father and a nurturing mother. These ingredients are essential in the raising of a young male. This is not the case today when faced with the prospect of raising young men. Women have entered virtually every domain once dominated by men, including the ideas and practices of raising a boy. There is one vitally important thing a women cannot do and that is be a father. A woman cannot infuse male energy into a young son. Boys need this masculine energy from their fathers. This is done thru the bonding experiences of a boy and his father. Simply put, men can teach their young sons things that a woman cannot.
Bonding with a father and relating experiences gives the young male purpose. A father’s emotional support and presence brings about his son’s strengths. He can also teach about his weaknesses and how to improve upon them. This notice of acceptance by a father can only help to improve his son’s masculine nature. He is then infused with masculine energy and well on his way to becoming a man. When a young man is marked by his father’s masculine energy he can be inspired into action and find his true mission in life. If that power is infused with wisdom and guidance there is no limit to what a strong masculine male can accomplish.
Many strong male individuals that have come before us have known a father’s emotional presence and wisdom can tame natural aggression and frustrations. Many believe this aggression is rooted from our primal beginnings. It is part of the essence of teaching a young boy to become a man. Allowing him to tap into his male energy. If this is lost or absent, the young son will not know how to tame his aggression and passions ultimately suppressing them. This is usually the case when boys are raised solely by women. A woman’s tendency is to control a young male and break him of his hostilities. Much like you would break a wild horse of its natural feeling of wanting to be free. While women have a key role in helping young males to find emotional balance and to help soften their cruel natures, a woman cannot do this alone. The fierce battles often raging between teenage boys and their mothers are cries for an escape from maternal domination.
Boys want to prove themselves to be men but are not allowed to do so. Their efforts are usually fruitless and they cannot wrestle themselves away from this female dominance. They feel powerless and oftentimes repress their true emotional natures. They then become the broken stallion and freedom is but a memory. The problem only worsens when a young boy is sent out into the world into his first social interaction. The world of government run educational institutions.
One of the first interactions a boy has with the outside world is the U.S. Educational System. In the past 30 years, this institution has waged an all-out assault on young males. They have left whole generations of young men feeling worthless and alone. While this is not the sole reason for the current crisis, its a major contributing factor. So what is a young father to do having to send his young son to a government run school? There are a few options. You could home school your children, you could send them to a private school or you could take your chances with the educational structure set in place.
If you choose to send your young man to a public institution, beware the pitfalls of your choice. You will have to be very vigilant about the curriculum. The systems currently set up do not bode well for a young male. If he does end up in a public school, there is a good chance his instructor or teacher will be a female. 76% of all teachers in the U.S. educational system are women. This will not be in your son’s favor.
Most female teachers believe all boys should be taught as girls. They believe in forming social relationships rather than academic substance. They do not understand the natural aggression of boys, the rough play, the joking with one another, and general male behavior. Most believe boys should be medicated and pacified. All of these actions by female educators bring about a sort of totalitarian order to a school system. Most male teachers are happy with letting boys be boys and girls be girls. Most female teachers however, want all boys to be taught as girls.
Importance on penmanship, neatness, orderly behavior and emphasis in group participation and cooperation usually smothers young men. Subjects such as math, science and other forms of technology are often geared towards female learning styles and leave young men bored and unchallenged. They tend to learn at slower rates and usually become disinterested. When this is the case, undesirable behavior usually surfaces.
Some of these young men can act out and cause problems. If they do not comply, they are usually drugged into submission or labeled as a problem child and the cycle keeps on repeating itself and churns out more uneducated young men. Is this what you want for your young son? This may not be the case in all schools. I paint a bleak picture of the educational system but believe the results speak for themselves. Look at where we are as a society with teaching young boys. Most of them have been emasculated and engendered to believe their behavior is not natural. They are left disillusioned and beaten down. As a result, they score higher on testing, but are far less likely to pursue higher education.
If I ran the world of education, I would have males teach males and females teach females. I used to believe in an integrated approach to education but now believe males learn best from other men. Fathers need to be on guard and teach their sons about the dangers of a system set up against them. Show them they have their son’s best interests at heart. If the challenge becomes too great, they must know there are other options available for educating them. Are you up for the challenge of teaching your son what he is up against in the current setup of our educational system? Can you educate your son in the right way?
If your son is lucky enough to make it thru the educational system and proves himself as a man, there are things you can teach him as he moves into adulthood. All young men need their fathers throughout their lives. You do not stop learning once you have reached manhood.
I was fortunate to have my father throughout my childhood but still lost him too early into early adulthood. There are many times in the past I could have used his wisdom in my life. Young men, as well as adults need to know this axiom. Without an involved father in their lives, they do not learn about the expected roles of the man in the house. They need to know men are at their best when they are leading, protecting, providing and teaching their sons and daughters about how to make sense of the world. If that is compromised, the woman of the household ends up being a proxy mother to the husband and the whole family unit suffers for it. This is what can happen when young men are not raised with a proper male role model.
If a father takes interest in what is important to his son, and he makes his son’s activity important by his attention, then the son will learn throughout his lifetime. When this happens, the adult son will learn to take interest in his own activities and family and feel worth and value. When that father is absent it is like an important ingredient missing from a meal. It can be hard to identify but there is no feeling of wholeness or sense of family. The unit is left hollow and empty.
This is exactly why sons need their father’s from a young age through adulthood. To show them the ways to be a man. If this change is made in the coming generations perhaps we can pull ourselves away from the abyss.
Future generations of men and women depend on it.
Be the BEST YOU at Any Age!